Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
Randomize
