But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
