So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
