omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Randomize
