No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
