He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
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