the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
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