I only kidnapped one of them. chill
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
