i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
