Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
