He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
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