wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
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