i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
wow bdsm is so cute
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
