So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
