she was so not down for the gang bang
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
My balls are so social today.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
