At least make sure they are 18
Why
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize