OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
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