'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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