Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Who died my cat blue again?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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