I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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