You're a womanizer and a bitch.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize