There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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