You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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