last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
