I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
Randomize
