Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
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