if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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