she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
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