I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
The power of my boobs compel you
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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