My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
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