I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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