U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
What the hell happened to my hand?
Well, you got in a fight with a cabbie while jaywalking, but we got you to walk away. The problem was 80 blocks away, when you punched a parked taxi for "running you over".
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I woke up in the middle of the night with my dick out and my electric blanket on high. It's like she wanted a hot dog.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
