are you still at the devil's house?
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
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