dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
The number of injuries I get impersonating Shakira while drunk is getting ridiculous. Sprained vagina, dude.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
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