lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
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you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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