we're blogging at a bar
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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