Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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