It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
I hope you dream of an avalanche of penises
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
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