For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
You did what with his pubic hair?
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