No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
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