Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Randomize