I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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