i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
I need a beard to bite.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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