Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
