My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize