Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I don't do stupid things anymore. I do stupid people.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Randomize
