question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
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