'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Randomize
