I'm going to rape someone's good day.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
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