I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Randomize
